Isolation, Good or Bad?

 

When mandatory isolation was enforced during covid, I actually didn't mind.  I didn't agree with the mandate itself,  but I didn't think it would affect me too much too be honest. During this time we also happened to move province away from our kids and grandkids, my mom for purely economical reasons.  It was such a hard decision. I knew it would be hard, but I also knew we could fly to see them a couple times a year and hey, there's always Facetime.  It wasn't too long before I realized just how difficult it would be.  Moving to a new town, not knowing a single person, being isolated because of covid, I thought I would be able to adjust. It began to take it's toll on me.  It began with severe insomnia that would end up persisting for over two years.  Literally sleeping 1-2 hours a day affected my physical health of course, but my mental health suffered immensely.  I could no longer watch the news, anything stressful would send me into a flare-up that could last for a week or more.  The doctor we had in town was not knowledgeable in fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue syndrome and the many other problems that come with those illnesses.  Basically told me to "buck up".  No support whatsoever.  I then heard about a pain clinic in Camrose and asked my GP for a referral, which he reluctantly gave.  There began my healing.  No it didn't deal with the isolation or the loneliness, but it did begin the process of healing, where I could begin to think straight, sleep better and look at things in a more reasonable way.  

I say all this to come to this point.  I was alone.  Alone and isolated, and although I felt this was a good thing at first, I became lonely. Extremely lonely and depressed.  I began to wonder if we had heard wrong.  From The Lord. When we decided to move from Chilliwack we prayed about it. For over a year we prayed about it and finally felt The Lord leading us to Alberta.  Not only did He lead us to Alberta, He provided us a house that was much lower in price, but perfect for us in every way.  Size, newly  renovated, just what we needed for our lifestyle.  So how could this be a mistake?  

The Bible tells us God is perfect. He is in control of everything and does not make mistakes.  Everything He Does for us He does for our good. So I began to dig into His word.  Deeply, sincerely, searching like I never had before.  I was desperate. Now, I've been a Christian for most of my life. I was raised in a Christian home, I became a Christian at 13 and was baptized that same year and yet I had never searched so deeply for the answers I needed until now. Yes, I read my Bible, did my devotions, spent time in prayer, but never had I felt so desperate to connect to God.  And then I did. Connect with God I mean. Personally from the depth of my soul I had never found myself so connected, so hungry for His word as this past year. His word fulfilled me. Gave me the peace I was searching for.  The answers I needed.  I then realized the purpose of my loneliness.  The reason God led us to Alberta.  The isolation, the loneliness, it was purposeful. He knew I needed to get to know Him more. To rely on Him more. For Him to be absolutely first and foremost in every aspect of my life.  He used this isolation to draw me closer to Him.  To make me actually hunger for Him. Each day draws me closer to Him. Beginning the day in His word and in prayer in a real and purposeful way is something I now hunger for.

Do I still have times of loneliness?  I do.  Especially around the holidays, my kids and grandkids birthdays, it sometimes feels unbearable.  Not being there with them can be heartbreaking at times.  But I know who to go to during these time.  The One who fills my soul in a real and tangible way.  And I'm so thankful He led us here.  To this time, to this place.  God in no way wants us to feel alone and isolated.  In fact His words tells us it is not good for man to be alone.  The Bible provides many passages that tell us we need fellowship, including the Old Testament's Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, which states that "two are better than one" and that one person can lift up a fallen fellow, and Proverbs 27:17, which says, "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another." In the New Testament, Hebrews 10:24-25 urges believers not to give up meeting together but to "encourage one another," and 1 Thessalonians 5:11 calls them to "encourage one another and build one another up". It's clear we are not meant to be on our own.  But sometimes God uses the pain and the isolation, the

loneliness to open our eyes. To draw us closer.  To make us wake up and recognize our deep need for Him.

And that's exactly what He did for me. 

So, don't despair in whatever you may be going through.  Pain, suffering, hurt. God has a purpose in it for

you.  Seek Him. Search Him deeply and sincerely.  He is faithful and will never, never let you down. He's 

growing you.  Maturing your faith.  And sometimes, we just don't recognize that. 

Blessings,

Ruth